Delusions
by karatekid1018
Summary: "And like a flash, Kurt Hummel leapt forward and slapped Finn Hudson clear across the face." What I think would've happened in "Theatricality" if Burt Hummel hadn't interfered.


**This has been bouncing around in my head for a while, so I'm gonna write it. Enjoy! **

** WARNING: Homophobic language! I hate those words, but this kind of made it necessary, so…**

"It's just a room, Finn!" Kurt shouted, surprising the taller boy. Kurt barely ever got _this _angry. "We can redecorate it if you want to!"

"Fine!" Finn shouted. "Then the first thing that needs to go is that _faggy _lamp!"

And Kurt froze for a second, barely even recognizing what Finn said next.

_No_.

And like a flash, Kurt Hummel leapt forward and slapped Finn Hudson clear across the face.

Finn gaped at Kurt, his hand flying to cup his smarting cheek. His stomach clenched at the site of bitter tears running down Kurt's porcelain face.

"What's the matter, Finn?" Kurt asked coldly. "Surprised that the _fag _actually has some courage?"

"Kurt…Kurt, no…"

"No, what? 'No, I didn't mean to call you a fag'?"

"I…I was talking about the lamp-"

"No you weren't, Finn," Kurt growled, his eyes darkening menacingly. "You were talking about _me_. You didn't call the lamp faggy, you called _me _a fag. _Admit _it, Finn."

Finn was dead silent for a moment, not sure what would or wouldn't set Kurt off.

"Kurt…Kurt, I'm sorry-"  
"Sorry for _what_, Finn?" Kurt shouted, his fists clenched in rage. "For calling me a fag, or standing on the sidelines holding my jacket while other people did? All I've ever wanted was to be your friend, Finn, at the very least, yet you avoid me like the plague and do next to _nothing _when I get constantly harassed."

"It's because you've made it _painfully _obvious that you're in love with me!" Finn pointed out, trying to get leg-up in their fight when it was basically impossible.

"I WAS NEVER IN LOVE WITH YOU!" Kurt screamed, coaxing Finn back into shocked silence. It was only _now _that Kurt had realized it; he never loved Finn. "I was in love with the _idea _of you, Finn; a strong, handsome man that would sweep me off my feet and protect me from everyone that tried to hurt me. And yet…you never did any of those things. All you've ever done for me is tell Puck not to shove me without _really _meaning it, or hold my designer jackets when I get tossed into a dumpster. You've never asked me if I was OK, or helped me climb out of the trash, so why was I 'in love with you'?"

White-hot guilt was burning in Finn's heart as the real Kurt Hummel was revealed to him. This wasn't the superior, fashion-conscious that everyone else saw-this was the Kurt Hummel inside. This Kurt was standing on the edge, and no one but him knew how many more shoves, dumpster-dives, and slurs mercilessly shouted at him would send him over it. Finn was just glad that his gratuitous mistake hadn't been the one to do it.

"Actually, I know why," Kurt continued, slightly calmer but the tears never ceasing their flow. "Because you were my faux knight in shining armor. You are the _first _boy I've ever known that hasn't treated me like absolute _crap_. Mike and Matt are great and everything, but they don't really acknowledge my existence, which makes me feel just as crappy as the dumpster-dives and the slushies. You're the only boy I know who recognizes that I am a _person_. I'm not an abomination, or a freak of nature. I'm _just a person_, a person with feelings and emotions a heart that gets torn to pieces every single day I step out of the house."

Finn gulped, wanting to reach out and wipe Kurt's tears away but refraining. He knew that if he touched Kurt…well, he didn't actually know what Kurt would do, but he definitely knew it would be bad.

"So, now you know. I apparently found myself 'in love with you' because you're the only boy who doesn't make me feel like I'm a freak of nature… and what does that say about my life, huh? That I delude myself into thinking I love the first boy who doesn't despise me for being _me_? Tell me, Finn…would you come to my funeral, or would your insane obsession with your reputation keep you away?"

And Finn couldn't take it anymore. He fell to his knees, dropped his face into his hands, and sobbed.

"Kurt," he choked out. "Kurt, I am _so sorry_. I am _so sorry _that I haven't done more for you. I am so sorry that I called you that _awful _word, and that I just _let_ other people do it. I…I'm supposed to be like your _brother_. God, I'm so ashamed of myself…"

"You should be," Kurt said, just _barely_ feeling sorry for the sobbing boy on the floor. "But I'll forgive you."

"W…what?" Finn asked, looking up at Kurt with his face streaked with sorrowful tears. "Why?"

"Because you're crying," Kurt said, wiping his own tears away. "If I had said any of that to Karofsky, or Azimio…they wouldn't care. They would laugh in my face and tell me to kill myself because they think I deserve it. But you…you know what you've done wrong, and you've apologized. I'm not saying I trust you, or even particularly _like _you…but I forgive you."

Finn joyously hopped off of his knees and took Kurt in his arms, stroking the younger boy's hair and holding him tightly.

"I promise I'll protect you from now on," Finn said, even going so far as to press a kiss on Kurt's forehead. Kurt wound his arms around Finn's waist, burying his face in his large chest and beginning to cry again. Finn held the shaking boy close, stroking his back in a calming fashion. "I won't let any of them lay a hand on you. I'll be the brother that I should've been all along, even though our parents aren't even married. I'll keep you safe, Kurt, I promise. You don't have to be afraid anymore. I'll protect you, I promise, I promise, I promise…"

Finn trailed off, clutching Kurt tightly and refusing to let go for a second. He'd been so _stupid _and so wrong and he was more ashamed of it than you could ever imagine…but Kurt forgave him.

And to Finn, that's all that really mattered.

**Aww, sad and then a happy ending. That's kind of my thing isn't it?**

** Review?**


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